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It's hard to ignore something as obvious as height, especially if it makes a person stand out.
While some people find that their height doesn't impact dating at all, others may feel that it allows for judgment, fetishization, and stereotyping.
It was as if he had peeped in on my mental conversation earlier that afternoon, when I was debating whether I should wear wedges or flats.“I don’t really know . While he probably just asked this question out of banal curiosity—he wasn’t exactly the tallest guy in the world—little did he know how loaded this question really was. Years before this, I went to an all-female high school, which meant that if there were going to be boys present at a dance, we had to invite them. Sure, Mark was my buddy from childhood—we talked on AIM all the time. Through high school and college, and even into my early twenties, with beau after beau, height was one of the defining characteristics in what I found attractive in a man.
I distinctly remember brainstorming who I was going to invite to my first dance as a freshman. He was cute, friendly, funny, and pretty much the ideal first-dance date candidate except for one thing: He was a couple inches shorter than me. If I still felt petite wearing four-inch heels with my frame of 5 feet 6 inches, he was worth my attention.
”It was a year after college, and the person asking me that was a guy I had just started casually dating.
He actually was a couple inches taller than me, but the question caught me off guard. probably not,” I awkwardly admitted, embarrassed that I had gone with the two-inch wedges. ” She laughed at me and said, “Oh, I promise, your priorities are going to change.” “Not about that,” I replied. When Mark asked me to his dance months later, I not-so-politely declined—“Oh, Mark, you know we are just friends”—and instead accepted a later invitation from his significantly taller but significantly less charming friend.
According to Malcolm Gladwell, as well as being predominately white and male, apparently CEOs are almost all tall. Reddit has a page called r/short where over 20,000 members discuss things like ‘heightism’ and the difficulties of dating as a short guy.
The first question most strangers ask me is "How tall are you? In one survey, about half of collegiate men required their date to be shorter, while a monstrous nine of every ten women said they would only date a taller man.
Kevin: I'm not one to complain about being short, because once you realize you can shop in the children's section and climb on top of things to get to out-of-reach objects, you're pretty much on a level playing field with the rest of the world. I think a lot of guys fetishize the height gap and say things like, "I'm so into you because you're so short," or "It's really hot knowing that I could lift you up in bed," etc.
Or guys can also be completely dismissive once they see me in person and say, "You seem much taller in your photos" or "I didn't realize how short you were until you got off that stool." I recently had one guy actually look over my head to see if the person he was meeting was someone else besides me. But of course in a completely contradictory way, I'm usually attracted to men who are much, much taller than I am.
" If I'm feeling charitable, I answer honestly: "6-foot-2." They often follow-up with, "Do you ever date shorter men? And online, it's even more brutal: Women can calculate how tall they are in their highest heels, add a few inches for good measure, and then filter out men who fall below that sum.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating